A.T.A.K. - The Anti-Telemarketer Audio Kit!

These are just small, lower-quality samples of what you'll get. When you buy A.T.A.K., you get CD quality, digital audio! To see the actual track lengths, check-out the HOME page.

Sampler #1
Sampler Length 0:50

Game Over (Female): You're listening intently to the telemarketer's scripted speech while the sound of a helicopter grows louder in the background. Suddenly the helicopter becomes very loud and the police are trying to talk you out with a bull-horn.

Rotten Stomach (Male): You're listening intently to the telemarketer's scripted speech, but you can't help having frequent outbursts of gas.

Crossed Line(Male): You're listening intently to the telemarketer's scripted speech, and suddenly a rather bizarre conversation breaks-in to your frequency.

Sampler #2
Sampler Length 1:30

UFO Landing (Male): You're listening intently to the telemarketer's scripted speech while, in the background, sounds of an alien spacecraft approaching grow louder.

Animal Kingdom (Female): You're listening intently to the telemarketer's scripted speech when your dog starts barking, and so does the donkey, and the chickens... you get the idea.

Game Show (Male): You answer the phone normally, and upon hearing it's a telemarketer, you ask them to hold for a second, as you forwarded your home phone to your cell, and it's almost your turn on a national game show.

Sampler #3
Sampler Length 2:20

Sweet Irony (Female): You start listening to the telemarketer's scripted speech, but then break-in to say that you are on the other phone, and it is revealed that you are also a telemarketer and are in the middle of a sale.

Mars Mission (Male): You're listening intently to the telemarketer's scripted speech when suddenly an "operator" breaks-in and reveals that your highly-classified mission to Mars has been given the green light. Of course, this line was supposed to be secured, but isn't.

Meet Albert: You answer the phone normally, and upon hearing it's a telemarketer, you ask them to hold for a second while you put "Albert" on. Albert is your automated attendant.

In Surgery (Female): You're listening intently to the telemarketer's scripted speech and apologize as you are performing an important surgical procedure.